decisions

Sometimes there are things that we just have to do.  They might cause us some pain, in one way or another, but we have to do them.  We feel loss, we miss something/someone, but again for one reason or another we have to do it.  Some might not understand, others might.  I think in these circumstances we usually don't want to do this 'thing' but we do because it's what is best for us....if not at first, then at some point when we realize that there's just no other option if we want to be loved and move on.

I'm in that now and every time I think about it it hurts, I am filled with loving and I wish it didn't have to happen.  But honestly it's what's best and it's what is fair for me.  Life is so often not fair to us and if there is something we can do, we should.  It helps if others, at least someone, understands....but yet even if not...if we've prayed about it, if we've searched the scripture, if we know we are in God's will....there really it doesn't matter....it's just simply the right thing to do.

Maybe we are thinking of this or that and things we have to continue for whatever reason....but we need to look at the whole picture in making our decision.  Because if it's wrong and hurting us or someone else, then in the end it can hurt others.  God can help to make that pain and hurt and sadness go away, we only need to ask.

We should always want to be in God's will, no matter what.  That's not always easy but it is something we should strive for.  Is God calling us to forgive, we should.  Is He calling us to move on, we should.  Is He calling us to start new and give a second chance, we should.  Is He calling us to love unconditionally, we should. And so forth.  He will give us the strength to get through whatever He's called us to go through.

I don't want to go through this, again.  I want something so completely different....but here I am.  And here I am making decisions, ones that I myself, in my own power, have no idea how to make.....but with God's help and with His wisdom and understanding I can make them and know I can make it through them.  He will put people and things in my life to help me.

Sometimes no matter what we do it is just not enough, even though we try so so hard.  But maybe that is God's plan?  His plan is not our plan.  Hard to hear, huh?  It's hard to speak as well.  Now knowing all of this and putting it into plan and actually doing something and moving forward is so hard.  Esp when you don't want it.  That's when you have to do what you know is the right thing to do....regardless.

Jesus....help me.  I can only make the right decisions and put them into place with YOU and Your power.