Is is really New Years Eve?

I know the calendar says that it is December 31....at 7:45pm, no less....but yet it does not feel like New Years Eve to me.  Almost the entire year of 2012 was a wash for me....and in some ways I am so looking forward to waking up tomorrow and knowing that I have a new start, and yet in other ways I am having a really hard time holding on to any hope that anything will be different.  It's, again, a struggle within myself.  Ok, I'm really getting tired of these struggles...help, God.

There's nothing going on at this house tonight.  It's doubtful that I even make it up to midnight....HA, actually I probably won't make it up until 10~ surely that's the New Years somewhere, right?  Gracie cleaned her room (shock, I know), we had an easy frozen meal for supper (it was yummy) and now we are watching the Dick Clark special....and playing on the computer.  I was hoping to crochet but since I'm losing what little steam that I had, I'm thinking that might wait until tomorrow.  For now I'm wondering what kind of snack I'm going to have and thinking about reading some more in the book I'm reading.  Wow, I'm exciting, aren't I?  Meag is out with friends, Gracie says she is staying up ALL night (we shall see).

I have made a list of things I want to organize and do tomorrow to start off my New Year 'right'.  Hopefully at least some of them will stick throughout the year.  I have a long road ahead of me in my quest in life....I'm unsure of so many things, feeling so alone but I know I'm on a journey that I must take and complete for whatever reason.

I wish you all a wonderful night with family and/or friends.  I wish you all a terrifically blessed 2013.  I wish you all to know my love for you.

Here's to the new year head of us....may 2013 be all that we want and wish for and more....and may it all be for God's glory.